When I am overwhelmed I like to make lists.
This list might have gotten a little out of control…
- Pack underwear. Wait, do I even wear underwear? Isn’t hospital like jail where they give you special clothes all the time? I hope hospital is not like jail.
- Pack a bathrobe. Note to self: buy a more super snazzy bathrobe.
- Pack slippers. Shit, I don’t have slippers. Note to self: get fluffy bunny and/or unicorn slippers.
- Pack a bra. What if they sew me back up so tight that my boobs don’t align? What if they sew me too loose and they end up in my armpits?
- Pack toothbrush and floss. Wait, who will brush and floss my teeth? Oh gawd, what if my teeth fall out … I really like having teeth.
- Pack hair product. Will it matter? I hope they give me a jaunty hat to match my hospital clothes. All stripes an’ shit.
Post-It-Notes to hide secret messages to the surgeon on my body.“Hey Surge, what’s up? You look nice in that mask”Ok fine, no Post-It-Notes- Do they play music during the surgery? Sweet mercy, suppose they play Nickleback, or Celine Dionne, or the BeeGees…?
- Pack some ear plugs (just incase) What if I forget the ear plugs in and wake up thinking I am deaf. Can you go deaf from heart surgery? I like hearing things.
- What if they forget something inside of me, like a syringe, or a watch, or a bagel or a Celine Dionne CD?
- Will I have to eat Jell-O? Hospitals always serve Jell-O. I don’t really love Jell-O.
Lists can be so helpful. Clearly I am totally ready to do this.
3 Comments
Tracy you are the most awesome HERO!! Love all your blogs lots of love Aunty Kay.
Thinking of you, you incredibly talented and funny and courageous girl.
Sian said it perfectly – talented, funny and courageous. I’m proud we share blood. Creepy, right?